i really dont know what to write about. i usually have many fleeting thoughts: sentences that i never get to finish. I have alot of great starts but i never see it through. The words slip out of my grasp just when i am ready to jot them down. i've waited too long and wasted a good amount of creativity.

It would seem that I'm really trying to elude my thoughts, my insights. The voice within me tries to speak out but i quell it, rather abruptly and i am bothered by my behavior.

I've always turned to writing whenever I pass an emotional patch. words encapsulate my deepest thoughts and feelings. it is as if for a moment, in that piece, my soul would ever so clearly speak and give me an unprecedented perspective on the things that have happened.

Time would stop and words would be pouring out and my hands struggles to keep up. i would be calm and yet tense. Very much like a delta where the river meets the sea i would be swirling in the mass of my emotions: sadness, serenity, melancholy, peace etc. By then there is no doubt that i have reached the end of a chapter in my life and that i would be starting a new one full of hopes and uncertainties.

There are many times in a day when i hope that thing would be better soon. when thinking about the past stop to bother me. I usually test myself on how far i've come to letting go. i listen to the old songs pass the same streets and remember the old days.

I am afraid that there is only one thing i am sure of: the determination to go on and keep going.